Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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