How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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