at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
