I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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