Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
