i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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