So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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