I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I just pynch a tree in the face
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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