yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
