yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize