I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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