so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
