I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
