Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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