I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
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