kristin has been a bad kristin
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
