My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
