You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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