I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
