I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She just used a chaser for red wine.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
