god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize