As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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