She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
