But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
