You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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