Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
