I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
