Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
worst night to have a conscience
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
