Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
