i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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