i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
