That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
