You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
