Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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