I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
it hurts more in the daytime
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
