Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
