Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
