hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
