she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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