If i come over, it means nothing
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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