I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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