she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize