Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
