He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize