I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
