i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
