I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
