i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
