As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
