you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize